i have no idea how this relates to being a programmer but i know it does

OH. MY. GOD. Someone just casually broadcasted their Microsoft session operator password (literally "Sab001") and then had the AUDACITY to remind everyone to use their personal credentials for minimum apps! 💀 This is the security equivalent of locking your front door but leaving a note on it saying "KEY UNDER DOORMAT" in neon letters. The security team is probably having simultaneous heart attacks right now while hackers are sending thank-you cards to the TV station! The absolute IRONY of a sign telling people to protect their credentials while broadcasting the password to millions is just *chef's kiss* perfection. Security through obscurity? More like insecurity through publicity!

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OMG the MENTAL GYMNASTICS we go through to justify our coding inadequacies! 🤸‍♀️ First we're like "I hate Java but I'm TOTALLY a coding genius" then we're like "OK fine I'm garbage at programming BUT THAT'S NOT WHY I hate Java!" It's the programmer's version of a breakup: "It's not you Java, it's me... but also it's definitely you." The absolute AUDACITY of us to blame the language while writing spaghetti code that would make an Italian chef weep! We're all just out here writing trash code professionally and looking for someone else to blame. PEAK DEVELOPER ENERGY!

The SpongeBob meme perfectly encapsulates that moment when junior devs worship the mythical "senior developers" from afar. Just like SpongeBob gazing longingly at the Krabby Patty sign, junior programmers idolize these legendary beings who somehow fix production bugs with a single line of code and understand the codebase that no one has documented since 2012. Meanwhile, actual senior devs are probably just Stack Overflow ninjas who've memorized which answers to skip and have a folder of pre-written apologetic emails for when things inevitably break. The sacred knowledge isn't magic—it's just years of making the same mistakes and developing an uncanny ability to Google the right error message.

Ah yes, the mythical "realistic programming movie." Instead of hackers typing at light speed to access the mainframe, it's just a dev team slowly descending into madness because their app won't compile. Meanwhile, scope creep lurks around every corner like a horror movie villain, and the project manager has somehow configured Slack notifications to appear directly in your nightmares. The follow-up tweet really nails the corporate dystopia - "Do I REALLY need to open a ticket for this life-or-death situation?" "Yes." Because nothing says emergency like proper documentation.