Plaintext Memes

SWEET MOTHER OF CRYPTOGRAPHY! 😱 The absolute HORROR of clicking "forgot password" and getting your ACTUAL PASSWORD emailed back to you! That's not a convenience feature—that's a full-blown security NIGHTMARE! It means they're storing your precious password in plain text like it's some casual grocery list! Any half-decent developer would be HYPERVENTILATING right now. Proper password storage should involve hashing, salting, and praying to the security gods—not keeping them in a "passwords.txt" file labeled "super important don't hack"! If a website emails your password back, run away screaming and change that password EVERYWHERE you've used it because honey, that database is one curious intern away from catastrophe! 💀

Ah, the "security through obscurity" approach taken to its logical conclusion. Storing passwords in plaintext - because nothing says "enterprise-grade security" like keeping all your users' credentials in a format readable by the intern who accidentally got database access. Sure, it reduces DB size by skipping that pesky hashing algorithm. Your database might be smaller, but so will your company after the inevitable breach. The cybersecurity equivalent of leaving your house key under the doormat because "no burglar would look there."

Oh sweet summer child! That "white dot" is the file being modified indicator—basically screaming "HEY, YOU HAVEN'T SAVED YOUR CHANGES YET!" But the real horror show? This person is casually displaying their plaintext password file for all of Reddit to see. Nothing says "hack me please" like showing off your passwords.csv with actual credentials. Somewhere, a security engineer is having heart palpitations while david13, john87, and friends are about to learn a valuable lesson about information sharing.

The North Pole's security practices are straight out of 2005. Storing billions of PII records in plaintext? Classic rookie mistake. Some poor elf clicked a suspicious "Free Candy Cane Gift Card" email, and now Santa's entire database is on the dark web. The naughty/nice list just became the biggest data breach in history. Imagine the GDPR fines if Santa operated in the EU. No amount of milk and cookies can fix this PR nightmare.

When a site tells you "your new password can't be the same as your old password," they're supposed to be comparing hashed values, not storing your actual password in plaintext. If they know what your old password was , they've already failed Security 101. The fact that a Fortune 500 company did this is like finding out your bank keeps everyone's money in a shoebox under the receptionist's desk. Ten years in tech and I'm still amazed at how many multi-billion dollar companies can't figure out basic password security.