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HTTP 418: I'm a teapot

The server identifies as a teapot now and is on a tea break, brb

HTTP 418: I'm a teapot

The server identifies as a teapot now and is on a tea break, brb

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Posts tagged with Order by

SQL Time Is Always Wrong Time

Databases Programming Debugging
6 months ago 464.0K views 0 shares
SQL Time Is Always Wrong Time
What happens when a DBA designs a clock? You get Roman numerals in completely random order because SQL queries without proper constraints do whatever they want. Notice how IX (9) is where 4 should be, and V (5) is at 6 o'clock. The comment "It Will Work This Time" is the eternal lie every developer tells themselves before running untested SQL in production. Spoiler: it never does.

Clock But It's SELECT DIGITS FROM NUMBERS ORDER BY DIGIT NAME DESC

Databases Programming
6 months ago 266.1K views 0 shares
Clock But It's SELECT DIGITS FROM NUMBERS ORDER BY DIGIT NAME DESC
OH. MY. GOD. This is what happens when you let a database admin design a clock! The numbers are in complete chaos because some SQL-obsessed maniac decided to ORDER BY DIGIT NAME DESC instead of, you know, ACTUAL NUMERICAL ORDER like a SANE HUMAN BEING! The SQL query literally sorted the digits by their spelled-out names in descending order, so "twelve" comes before "three" which comes before "ten" and so on. Can you imagine trying to tell time on this monstrosity?! It's like asking what time it is and getting back "SELECT CURRENT_TIME FROM REALITY WHERE SANITY = NULL"!

Today's picks

Genuinely Can't With These People

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Better once too often than not often enough!

Better once too often than not often enough!

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My Theory on why Windows 11 will definitely suck, probably. The IEOMOS Theory.

My Theory on why Windows 11 will definitely suck, probably. The IEOMOS Theory.

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117.4K views 4 years ago