Jobhunting Memes

Ah, the recruiter who's shocked that someone answers the phone like a normal human instead of reciting their entire LinkedIn profile. Same energy as those senior devs who expect junior applicants to solve a red-black tree algorithm while standing on one foot before saying "hello." The irony is delicious - a recruiter who probably cold-calls 50 people a day is suddenly offended that someone doesn't answer with a rehearsed speech. Next they'll want us to answer Slack messages with our full name, title, and a statement of purpose. Pro tip: If you're expecting a specific call, maybe save the number in your contacts? Technology is amazing that way. But what do I know, I've only been answering phones with "hello" for 20 years while somehow managing to hold down a job.

That glorious moment of power when a LinkedIn recruiter messages you about an "exciting opportunity" while you're comfortably employed. Suddenly you're no longer the desperate peasant begging for scraps—you're aristocracy, looking down your powdered nose at their "competitive salary" and "ping pong tables." The tables have turned, and now you get to ghost them after a single conversation. Revolutionary!

OH MY GOD, the AUDACITY of these LinkedIn recruiters! One minute they're sliding into your DMs with "I found your profile IMPRESSIVE" and the next—POOF!—they vanish into thin air the SECOND you dare ask about compensation! 💸 It's like watching a magician perform the world's fastest disappearing act, except the only thing being sawed in half is your patience! The recruiter's ghost game is STRONGER than their actual recruiting skills! And don't even get me started on the "competitive salary" nonsense... competitive with WHAT? A part-time job at the dollar store?!