Corporate hell Memes

Posts tagged with Corporate hell

Someone Please Break My Fingers

Programming Devops Agile Debugging Backend

2 months ago 106.5K views 0 shares

Someone Please Break My Fingers

That classic dilemma: maintain job security by implementing the company's terrible ideas or end it all to spare yourself the shame of what you're creating. Nothing says "professional growth" quite like building integrations nobody asked for that actively make the product worse. The real tragedy? You'll still have to maintain that garbage code for the next five years while management calls it "innovative." Bonus points if they add it to your performance review as a "key achievement."

What Jira Does To A Mf

Agile Devops Programming Debugging

5 months ago 101.6K views 0 shares

What Jira Does To A Mf

Ah, the classic developer transformation pipeline! You start as a bright-eyed engineer with dreams of changing the world through code, then Jira happens. Nothing sucks the soul out of a developer faster than watching your creative aspirations dissolve into an endless backlog of tickets, story points, and sprint planning meetings. That resume snippet in the middle is the smoking gun - "worked with 10-person Scrum team in Agile environment" might as well read "slowly had my will to live drained through two-week increments." The transformation from happy human to murderous CEO is just *chef's kiss* accurate. Your manager keeps saying "it's just a tool to help us organize" but we all know it's actually a portal to the ninth circle of developer hell.