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Content GUYS DONT (DO NOTI CODERBILE PROTEIN

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Content Async ( 9 Paris Arc I OxAsync No mom it's not a "messy pile of clothes on my chair" it's an L1 cache for fast random access to my frequently used clothes in O(1) time. It needs to be big to avoid expensive cache misses (looking in my closet). I NEED to be minimizing latency, this is important to me. Please.

Start with a normal function handshake, end with the ENTIRE CODEBASE being infected with async/await! 😱 The moment you introduce ONE async function into your pristine synchronous paradise, it spreads faster than gossip in a developer Slack channel! Suddenly EVERYTHING needs to be async, your functions are covered in purple Teletubby suits, and your once-simple code is now a hellscape of Promises and .then() chains! The async plague has no cure - resistance is futile! Your beautiful sequential code? MURDERED in cold blood by the async mafia!