Retrospective Memes

Posts tagged with Retrospective

Un-Natural Disasters

Un-Natural Disasters
The corporate response cycle in its purest form. Server room floods, everyone panics, forms a committee to discuss root causes, writes up a beautiful "lessons learned" document with all the right buzzwords, then promptly ignores the actual fix because... well, committees don't fix roofs, do they? Notice how "Fix roof?" is crossed out at the bottom of that email. That's not a bug, that's a feature of enterprise culture. Why solve the actual problem when you can have endless retrospectives about it instead? By the time they schedule "Server Room Flood Retrospective #4," the poor guy is literally standing in water again. The real disaster isn't the flood—it's the organizational paralysis that treats symptoms while the bucket keeps overflowing. At least the documentation is getting better though, right?

What Went Right (Nothing Went Wrong)

What Went Right (Nothing Went Wrong)
The pure, unbridled joy of escaping the dreaded retrospective meeting is like landing a production deployment with zero bugs. No need to rehash last sprint's disasters or explain why your estimate of "2 story points" somehow turned into a two-week odyssey. For one blessed day, nobody's asking why you committed directly to main or why the database is held together with duct tape and prayers. Freedom tastes so sweet!

When Are We Supposed To Work

When Are We Supposed To Work
The daily life of a developer in an "agile" environment that's about as agile as a concrete truck. 100 standups, 100 sprint plannings, 100 backlog refinements, and a 10-hour retro... EVERY SINGLE DAY!!! The One Punch Man parody perfectly captures that moment when your manager thinks all these meetings somehow make you more productive. Meanwhile, your actual coding time has been reduced to those precious 7 minutes between your 2:53 PM and 3:00 PM meetings. Who needs to write code when you can talk about writing code instead?