Ah, the classic cloud provider panic attack. Three identical red buttons labeled "Azure DevOps," "AWS DevOps," and "GCP DevOps" with a sweating person having an existential crisis below. It's like being asked which kidney you'd prefer to donate. The truth? Your resume needs all three, your sanity can handle none, and your company will probably switch platforms right after you become certified in one. The real punchline is that six months after mastering your chosen platform, management will announce they're "pivoting to a multi-cloud strategy" anyway. Just close your eyes and press one—the anxiety is the only constant.