Immutability Memes

Posts tagged with Immutability

Stop Doing Haskell: When Math Professors Attack

Stop Doing Haskell: When Math Professors Attack
Functional programming purists have gone too far! While we're all using CONST to make variables immutable, Haskell folks are over here with their monads, currying, and type signatures that look like hieroglyphics from an alien civilization. The beauty of this rant is that it perfectly captures the existential crisis of every developer who's peeked into Haskell's mathematical purity only to back away slowly. "Hello I would like [1,2...] apples please" - because apparently ordering groceries requires a PhD in category theory now. Those code snippets with question marks are the programming equivalent of opening a physics textbook to a random page and questioning your career choices. The mathematicians have indeed played us for absolute fools!

Array Dot Reverse Have Sealed Your Fate Brendan Eich

Array Dot Reverse Have Sealed Your Fate Brendan Eich
This meme is hitting JavaScript developers right where it hurts! The title "Array.reverse Have Sealed Your Fate Brendan Eich" is a direct callout to the creator of JavaScript himself. The cardinal sin being mocked here is writing methods that mutate the original array AND return the same instance - like our beloved villain Array.reverse() . It's the programming equivalent of changing someone's furniture around while they're in the bathroom and then gaslighting them about it. Pure functions? Never heard of her. These mutating methods are why senior devs wake up in cold sweats at 3 AM screaming "IMMUTABILITY!" before checking their git history. Even God himself (or at least a cartoon deity with an impressive beard) has reserved a special place in programmer hell for the perpetrators. Not just regular hell - the boiler room. Where they'll probably be forced to debug Internet Explorer compatibility issues for eternity.