Hand-holding Memes

You know your tutorial design has achieved legendary status when people are still roasting it two years later. The excessive hand-holding, the patronizing waypoint markers, the "follow the giant glowing arrow for 100 meters" gameplay loop—it's like the game thinks you've never used a controller before. Modern AAA games have become so terrified of players getting lost for 0.3 seconds that they've turned into interactive GPS systems with occasional combat. Remember when games let you figure things out? When exploration meant actually exploring instead of following a golden breadcrumb trail? Now we get five different UI elements screaming "WALK FORWARD" like we're toddlers learning object permanence. The real kicker is that devs spend millions on gorgeous open worlds, then force you down a linear hallway decorated with arrows. It's like buying a sports car and having the manufacturer weld the steering wheel in place. At least by 2026, maybe we'll get an achievement for successfully following a waypoint without getting distracted. Progress!