Academic research Memes

When your algorithm goes from O(n³) polynomial time to O(10⁸⁹⁷n²·⁹⁹⁹⁹ + 3⁵⁵lg²³(n)), theoretical CS folks suddenly think you've achieved something groundbreaking. Because nothing screams "publishable research" like taking a simple cubic complexity and turning it into an absolute monstrosity of exponential and logarithmic terms that would make your CPU weep. Sure, O(n³) is "unpublishable" because it's too straightforward, but slap on some ridiculous exponents and suddenly you're conference-paper material. The best part? Both are probably still slower than just using a hash map.